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When leaders gets in trouble...
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I assumed I should relocate these too...
EPISODE 1: INTRODUCTION
Arakfu, leader of the Shantis, stood up. "How can the United Worlds Federation act up on a galactic level if it remains such a secondary force?"
"I didn't know we were even a 'secondary force'." sneered Ar'thul, a Varan.
"Well, what do you suggest?" the representant of the Altarian system of Guernevy retorted.
"If the Shanti representative had a suggestion, we would be discussing it!" cut the senate leader, a massive, four armed Baltar. "The point of the Shanti representative is to get suggestions."
"We could join one of the larger council." pointed out a Jinguisem represantative whose name nobody could pronounce.
"This is an idea I support." the Dihanar announced.
It was an heated discussion, especially considering that many races despised the idea of losing influence by joining a larger alliance, but it was finally voted at 43 vs 24. The United World Federation would join with a council whose philosophy was similar: to allow smaller nation to play a role by uniting them together.
On the 24 september 2546, human notation, the United World Federation joined the Diplomats Council.
EPISODE 2: INTRUDING THE SENATE
Impressed delegates circulated in the whole building. The mineral Shupass discussed with Üxkolak, former leader of the Federation.
"You know, it actually seems that we can act out our message much more effectively here." The cave-dwelling alien said.
"It was to be expected. Not only do we are allied to people many of us never met before, but they can help us contact others, even farther away." the larger one replied.
"This place is gorgeous!" The Rodaerot Queen exclaimed, passing by, and they both did whatever in their race's body language was an equivalent of palming one's forehead.
Accepting a female leader in the United World Federation had caused an extremely heated debate, nearly a scission, and it was a still often regretted decision.
"What is in there?" She said, approaching an immense arch's control panel to deactivate the opaque energy field closing it.
"NO!" The two other delegates ran (Or whatever they did) to her. "That is the Council Chamber!"
They reached just as the field shut down and closed their sensory receptors.
"We are not allowed in there!" A'ou'p's, the shupass, explained, trying to drive the Queen away, but she used her mental power to mind-slap him as he unfortunately reached into a more private area of her body. She grunted.
"Come on! It's not like they seem to mind!" She cheered them up.
Their eyes opened in surprise, and they could see that she was right. None of the dozen or so senate members seemed to notice them.
"Let's try not to get noticed." Üxkolak sensibly suggested, and he hurried them up toward sieges in a farther away section of the immense room.
These people certainly liked to go out gargantuanly.
EPISODE 3: GUEST WRITER
By PeacePhoenix
They reached the sieges and sat down. But it didn't help them to lurk into the senate debate: for an unknown reason, they couldn't hear anything useful from the senators. It looked like some powerful device was in place that transformed the senate debate in pure noise, even for people with lip- or mind-reading capabilities.
They were staring at each other trying to determine what to do next when they saw a orange light approching them. As the light was closing in to them, they saw that it had a bird shape. Finally, a orange-red and yellow phoenix was left standing before them and spoke peacefully:
"Greetings new members. As I see, you have tried to access an unauthorized area. But it doesn't matter since the control panel and the associated force field was just here to let us know who would try to access the council chamber. As you can see, we have a better way of assuring the privacy of the debate. Only senators are allowed to participated. Those who aren't allowed can't intercept the debates."
The phoenix added: "The security team is very proud of their achievement. As soon as they find a security breach, they close it.
Have a good day".
And the phoenix left them in the same way it has come.
EPISODE 4: OLD-AGE AGES-OLD ELVES
--2 weeks later--
"Üxkolak! Look at this!" Arakfu whispered excitedly to the leader in the next siege.
"Yeah. I've noticed. 'Audience for accession of the Elven Confederation'. This is going to be good."
At this moment, the delegation entered the room, wearing classical age tunics.
"Excuse me," said a voice behind them. Looking back, they could see it was the Vandycan represantative. "but I couldn't help overhearing your convesration. Do you know of them?"
"Most definitely" snorted Arakfu. "The Elven Confederation is from the same Galactic Arm as we were, but due to an unfortunate diplomatic blunder..." At this point, he glared toward the Rodaerot Queen, a dozen seats to his right. "They wouldn't want anything to do with us, not even a commercial treaty."
"That's rather harsh."
"They are extremely chauvinistic." Üxkolak pointed out. "And it's not like they have any reason!"
"Tell me about it." the Maahk delegate piped in from his other side. "Their technology is nearly 2 centuries late!"
"Their last important breakthrough was the iron-Lead peroxyde as stabilisator in slower-than-light propulsors." Arakfu added, rolling his eyes. "Their civilization has been declining for nearly a millenia."
One of the Maahk's secondary eyes suddenly caught something. The main delagate's tunic seemed to somehow be unbuttoning all by itself. (these old-age tunics are closed with buttons on the backside)
"Uh, people, I think someone is going to cause another diplomatic incident!"
He nodded at the queen, and they all turned sharply their eyes at her to see that she was concentrating and looking intently at the Elven delegate with a very non-engaging smile (or whatever it was) across her face.
"This is not good!" Arakfu said, getting up.
EPISODE 5: DIPLOMATIC INCIDENTS 101
Üxkolak and Grek-6, the Maahk,followed suit. Vandycan, slightly confused, stayed there looking as they ran along the row of seats, knocking down the sleepy Varan delegate in the process.
In a grinding noise of abused metal (thanks to the baltar's sharp claws), they stopped behind the queen. Focussed on her task, she didn't notice them until Arakfu slapped her behind the head. Sputtering and surprised, she let go of her telepathic manipulation in such a sharp way that the Elven High Delegate's tunic was neatly ripped in half and the parts sent to opposed sides of the audition podium.
"Uh oh." was the only think that could come to Arakfu's mind. The Rodaerot queen blushed a short moment before exploding in what could only be described as "ultrasonic fits of hysterical laughs".
Several screams of horror echoed across the room, and a young Yadel prince fainted.
The delegate's body was entirely covered with horrid suppuring tumors*. Covering himself the best he could, he somehow managed to yell his anger so that even without the microphone, he could be heard across the whole small-town-sized room.
He snatched his robe, which seemed to have fallen over a small greenish box with a symbol in a language unknown to anmybody present. The severed fabric element, however, apparently got caught on some sort of lever. The extremely annoyed, and now quite embarrassed delegate tugged sharply on it, incidentally pulling the lever.
The engine emitted a "Beep", which repeated itself every 2 seconds, then every 1 and half, and so on with an accelerating rate. An alarm suddenly blared.
"Oh NO!" Weapon Master Vandycan exclaimed. "Everybody get out of the room! NOW!"
*The degeneration afflicting the Elves is not only moral and scientific, but also physical. they are sickly and extremely prone to terminal-type illness. Most panimmunity treatment can do little to help them.
EPISODE 6: QHAT'S GOING ON BEHIND THAT ARCH?
Grek-6 and the Vandycan leaned against the wall, their breaths wheezing.
"Just what was in that box?" the methan-breathing alien asked.
"Some sort of nasty mutant proteo-virus we found on the third moon of Guitry XV." the Weapon Master explained.
"And what does it do?" Grek-6 pushed further.
"I don't know. We haven't tested it on anything yet." The maahk stared at him with his front eyes.
Then, the intercom went alive.
"Hey! Let me out! I don't wanna miss the fun." said an annoyed voice.
Grek-6 clapped his hand on his knee, equivalent to his race of rolling his eyes. Yet they had made sure the damned one was toroughfully unconscious before exiting.
"I can see you!" she said threateningly as the Vandycan suddenly felt his feet giving up under him. Everybody looked at him as he started floating in mid-air.
"Hey! What's that cloud?" the Rodaetor exclaimed. "OoooOOoh! Pretty colors!"
Then a thudding sound and a beefy security operator lunged to catch the Vandycan before he fell to the ground, landing in a group of korrigans.
Grek-6 looked at Arakfu and A'ou'p's.
"So, what now? Do we open the door?" He asked in his race's usual raspy tone.
INTERLUDE 1: CHARACTER SURVEY
ARAKFU
Race: Shanti
Sex: Male
1rst Apparition: Episode 1
Arakfu is leader of his race, elected among family leaders (The Shantis work as an enlightened Oligarchy), he always try to work out the best for everybody.
Shantis have inverted knees, no body hair, a pale brown skin, small horns in plac of ears and no bones in their hands. Their brain is very logical and they are specialist in electronics. Their traditional enemies are the Papinists.
ÜXKOLAK
Race: Baltar
Sex: Male
1rst Apparition: Episode 1
Üxkolak could be best desribed as an elected "king", since he is the only elected leader in his homeworld's political structure. Baltars have four arms on two shoulders and small butting horns, looking slightly like goatish demons.
A'OU'P'S
Race: Shupass
Sex: Unknown
1rst Apparition: Episode 2
A'ou'p's is not sure just how he got where he is currently. It seems that he simply was the only voluntary to this position.
Shupussi are a mineral-based lifeform native to the cave of an errant planet without a sun. They see things with a radar-type sense and feeds of special radiations emitted by their planet's soil. (sing. Shupass, pl. Shupussi)
THE RODAEROT QUEEN
Race: Rodaerot
Sex: Female
1rst Apparition: Episode 2
The Rodaerot Queen is a bubbly, airy, blonde-ish hereditary queen. While she is technically a female from a purely biological point of views, her species' sexual anatomic characteristics are inverted from those of many races. The Rodaerots are powerful psions.
GREK-6
Race: Maahk
Sex: Neutral
1rst Apparition: Episode 3
Grek-6 is not originally a politician: he is a fleet commander who justhappened to be in the area when the UWF was formed, and was appointed as his people's representative. He tends to be slightly confused about discussed issues.
Mahks are wider than tall, they have a rigid neck and a banana-shaped head with 2 eyes at each extremity giving them a 360-degree vision. They are at hime most in methan-based atmosphere and while they have humanoid hands, their arms are extremely flexible.
"Just Mentionned" characters and races:
Ar'thul: A varan
Altarians
Jinguisems
Dihanars
Elves: Atlantean, Perseid, Tucanid, Achernar High Elves and some other whose names I can't remember right now.
Yadel Prince: son of the Yadel delegate
Korrigans
EPISODE 7: A MASS DESTRUCTION WEAPON'S FIRST TRY
A security operator was frantically trying to get the cameras in the room to work. Arakfu shoved him aside.
"Let the expert do the work." He said, gleefuly typing at the console like a psychotic octopus.
"Camera. Signal. Present." announced an artificial voice.
"Well, then show it!" He stared for a moment at the original diplomats. "You call THAT and artificial intelligence?"
A part of the arch started shimmering... then nothing. It stayed black. Arakfu looked at it with squinted eyes, then resumed typing.
"Spectrum. Vision. Activated."
Several screen showed up. One showed a psychotic swirl of color, another a reddish shimmering form on the ground, the others remained black.
More typing.
"Whipers. Activated."
A small window suddenly cleared in the middle of the lens. It showed the room. Covered in splashes of bright colors, and the prone shape of the Rodaerot queen leaning against the arc. She had apparently fainted. A'ou'p's started laughing.
"Great weapon of mass destruction you've got there!" He stuttered between two fits of laughers. "Covers everything with a layer of colored microorganisms!" He rolled on the floor.
"We'd better get the Queen out before she suffocate. It must have blocked her respiratory pores." Üxkolak noted.
"And why would we want to do that?" Vandycan asked.
"Because her daughter is far stupider than she is." Arakfu retorted, turning the field off... To reveal an opaque wall of magnificent colors. He blinked.
"These things are always full of surprises..." Vandycan said, approaching and eyeing the thing with an evident interest.
EPISODE 8: WHEN ALL ELSE FAILS...
Three korrigans approached the console and piled up so one of them could reach the screen. He squinted his eyes.
"I think you should have a look at this." He said hesitatingly.
"Why is that?" Arakfu said, poking at the opaque wall of unknown substance with a wooden stick.
"Because either the camera is seriously unfocussing or the furniture is melting." The small creature answered calmly.
"WHAT?" He rushed to the console.
"Zoom. Activated." announced the now familiar voice.
Everybody looked at the holo-screen still hanging in mid-air just before the arch. It was very evident that that desks, podiums and chairs were somehow melting to the ground. A chandelier fell down in the middle of the room without a sound. Then, the screen flickered and was replaced with static. A very faint crashing was heard, or rather detected.
"Signal. Lost."
"I've noticed, thank you." The korrigan said sarcastically.
"My. Pleasure."
"What was that noise?" Arakfu asked.
"From the sound, probably the camera falling down." Aqu~i, the first Korrigan, answered. (Korrigans have very keen hears.)
"Well, at least we know that these things eat metal." Verrva, the second one added.
"What about the queen?" A'ou'p's reminded them. "If it was any other sort of weapon, I'd go in happily, but half my body is composed of titanium and lead..."
"What about the building?" Senator Foehnix pointed out.
"What about us?" nervously asked a delegate.
"I'll go." an hollow voice stated.
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EPISODE 9: 999 USES FOR A BELT
Looks switched toward the middle of the crowd. To a humanoid lizard.
"What?" Ar'thul said.
"I always though you hated her the most?" Üxkolak was slightly confused.
"Aren't you the one who had her throne explode back on Rodar IV?" Asked A'ou'p's.
"Well, if she dies in there, I won't get to test my new stink spray." He said matter of factly.
"Oh yeah, he loves practical jokes." Explained Üxkolak to Vandycan.
"And besides," the varan continued. "Ot's not half as bad as my neighbouring."
"What is your..." Vandycan started, but a shanti hand clasped over his mouth.
"Don't even try to get him started." Arakfu warned him. "He's been trying to have a freeze in rents voted on his home worlds for years."
"Well, I shouldn't be in there too long." Art'hul stated. "Will you just be so kind as to give me a end of that belt to hold in case, and we'll be all set." He adressed Aqu~i.
"Errr... Ohay." The blue-skinned midgetish creature untie the lenght of ropy fabric and handed it over, holding his djellaba-like pants.
"Hold it, will you?" Art'hul handed him the other end. "If I tug on it, you pull me out.
"Sure." The two other korrigan went to help. "We're ready."
"Okay, I'm going in."
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wHO dO yA tHINK wOULD rEAD aLL tHAT mATE
bUT i'M sURE iTS GGGOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOODDD
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EPISODE 10: WHERE THIS THING PROBABLY REACHED PG-13
The humanoid lizard pushed it's way into the room. Like plastic wrap, the organism stuck to him as he felt around to find th queen.
"Damn. I can't see a thing." he though.
Now, which side of the door was the intercom on? Right one. Great. He'd been walking to the right. He stopped as he felt a sharp tug. He was now at the extremity of the 6-feet belt.
"To the left, now"
Meanwhile
"Watch out!" Qua~vi warned as the ropy garment unexpectedly went past his hand. Verrva didn't caught on tim and Aqui~ had to seriously pull on the belt for Art'hul to stop.
He didn't notice that his pant had dropped due to the lack of anything to pull them up. Fortunately, considering half the delegates technically went nude, it didn't cause too much problem (The fact most people would agree he had a good-looking ass anyway certainly helped). Besides, everybody was looking at the belt.
It clearly moved to the left. The queen had been on that side of the door when they'd last seen her through the camera.
Art'hul wasn't having an easy time. He had that thing in his eyes, in his ears, in his nose, and in some other places he prefered not to think about. Plus it was moving.
He was now crouched, feeling around with his right hand and following the wall with his left.
Then something hit him.
"Must be her." He grbbed the feebly moving object and tugged at the belt, following the way it lead.
[Message Edited]
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EPISODE 11: AND HERE GOES THE FLOOR...
Has he followed the pulling rope, Art'hul started hearing ominous crunching noise. His feet suddenly sunk as if he'd been walking in deep mud.
"Oh no... The Floor is giving away."
The noises where very audible on the other side of the virus wall too. Ensued a sickeningly long sound of tortured metal and a thunderous crashing.
Then Aqui~ disapeared into the substance.
"Korrigans to me!" Verrva yelled, fighting against the weight. Before anybody could have come and help, the dozen or so small creatures were pulling Art'hul, Aqui~ and the queen back.
The Korrigan leader's head appeared first, swearing. "That fir-i-man cost me an arm an a leg!" he said, refering to the pants that had been left behid, obviously caught in the slightly gooey substance. For some reason, it didn't seem to cling to him in anyway, though.
Then the Varan appeared and pulled himself to safety, pulling the queen unceremoniously by her leg. He coughed, sending small balls of the thing on the floor.
The queen leered at him. Something was way off. She said something, but no sounds came from her mouth. The Korrigans and Üxkolak immediately clasped their hands on their hear as if they'd been hearing some exemple of fine classical elven music (Which a human would probably have described as "a thousand healthy cats in a half-fonctionnal clothes dryer").
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EPISODE 12: MY RODAEROT WEDDING
Damnit. He couldn't hear in the ultrasounds.
"Please! Someone get her an infra-amplifier!" Aqui~ moaned.
Noticing the problems she caused, the queen stopped talking. Art'hul didn't like at all the smiles that crept on several delegates' faces.
"What did she say?" he asked Arakfu, who seemed to be only barely keeping his sides from splitting.
"She said that she was glad her new husband was a good-looking one!" Giving him, Arakfu's laughers exploded like a dozen warheads. Art'hul casted an horrified look at the queen.
No way! Was the sentence repeating in his mind. He stepped back.
A security offer then came an handled the queen a new infra-amplifier, her old one having been dissolved by the nasty metal-eating viri.
"I wanted to see who would be brave and lovely enough to come and save me." She gave a sigh and her left antenna moved in what could be said an inviting fashion. "You see, my husband has died back on the hive world, and new genes are needed in the most short delays, but..."
She was cut by a sizzling sound and sparks as the control console died. t became very apparent the microorganisms were eating through the walls as well as the floor.
"How about we continue this discussion outside?" Senator Shalom suggested.
Then the wall of viri blocking the archway gave up and detached itself at the top, falling down on them. Throwing away the stuff, the congregation started to evacuatuate the building as fast as possible.
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